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Monday, June 14, 2010

Explanation of sorts

I had a blog post in draft all ready to go, just waiting to take some pictures. It was explaining why I had decided to stop using the blogging format that I had been using for a few months and just post stuff when I felt like it. Even the circumstances of what I was doing changed during the week I took to write that post, and I added extra notes here and there. It was turning into a novella, with footnotes.

Then life royally screwed me over and that post is still in draft form. I will still post it, possibly in its current form but with extra footnotes! and photos.

I have been estranged from my father for many years - the last ten years this time round, with many other intervals of estrangement in particular. Although a highly intelligent and interesting man, he was also very obsessive and cruel to those closest to him. The latest parting of the ways came after he said unutterably cruel things to me about my young son, and I decided that my children had to come first.

He died last week. And I had to deal with the arrangements. It involved a sudden dash to Canberra, finding the body (no-one knew where it was, for a while), finding the will, etc. He was an obsessive hoarder. Not just books and pictures and things, but empty cardboard boxes and plastic bags. Queanbeyan recycling won't know what's hitting them right now! We spent two days sorting things out, and will be going back in a fortnight to sort the actual objects properly so that they can be distributed according to his will (which he had placed in a safe place two years ago, then during a reorganising spree placed it on a chair and piled stuff on top of it and never retrieved it from there. It took a long time to find it).

I promise the next post, during the next few days, will have pictures!

3 comments:

Penny said...

Hi Judy.

Thanks for leaving a comment on my blog. It is very nice to 'meet' you! I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your blog at length whilst driving up to Bendigo with the family (LURVE my iPhone). You write as if thinking aloud - so natural and appealing.

It was really interesting seeing your past work from the course. I expect now it is a very different beast. Unfortunately, Collin and Tony left half way thru last year- they were both such a wealth of knowledge and have been a loss to us. However, in an attempt to accentuate the positive, the course has been injected with some fresh, enthusiastic blood, so on we trudge! If we could only just put a bomb under admin, all would be well. Terribly, terribly disorganized and frustrating to the point of exploding at times.

Sorry to read of the loss of your father. Despite the strained relationship, such an event always manages to stir up the emotions. Not to mention all the physical work entailed in sorting through all the 'stuff' one collects along the way.

I look forward to future blog posts Judy.

Penny.

Sue said...

Thinking of you - all sorts of feelings to deal with in these circumstances. Love xxx

Jill said...

Hi Judy,

I'm coming late to this because I've been away for a few weeks.

I'm sorry to hear about your father. I hope you have the opportunity to work through your loss, and to reclaim the things that were good in the man and in your relationship with him.